Sunday, August 8, 2010

Mine, MIne, Mine, Can it be all Mine?

 If your kids are anything like ours, this scene from Finding Nemo seems to play itself out nearly every day in our house! This seems to become exponentially true the larger the quiver of children. It has always been part of raising kids and dealing with who has what and what is fair for each of them depending on their ages and maturity level. It has come to the forefront even more since Fisher joined the ranks 5 months ago.

He is 3 years old and in serious competition with his 5 year old brother for everything! Every object in the house, even this silly pink hat of his mothers, becomes a conversation around, "can it be mine, all mine?" Of course we initially go down the path, of no that belongs to so and so, or no we all share that, etc... Only to be met with a few more pleas of mine, mine, mine, can it be all mine?

At times we are left contemplating is he just being a typically selfish 3 year old, or he is outwardly expressing some repressed feelings of belonging? Does he have a deep rooted need to "know" that something is his and his only for the first time in his life, or is he just wanting everything to be his, as is our sin nature?

Needless to say we try to find a balance between feeding his selfish nature to control everything, and everyone, versus his need to have comfort and ownership and control of something given the first 3 years of his life has had only a modicum of these things. This wasn't really an issue with Eli as he joined at us at such a young age and his age difference to the next sibling. We'll keep doing our best to balance hard wired longings due to his circumstances and normal toddler aged behavior. In the mean time, I'll keep trying to laugh as I envision the birds from Nemo attempting to make everything edible, theirs, and only theirs.

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